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WHAT'S WRONG WITH A PROPER JOB?

By: Stan Cullimore

This is the sort of question where the answer you receive depends almost entirely on the person you ask. As far as your mother, or father, is concerned, Nothing-Is-Wrong-With-A-Proper-Job. As far as you are concerned, everything is wrong with it.

In the words of someone famous (I forgot who it was), “I love proper jobs, I could watch other people doing them for hours!” Which means that the real question you should be asking yourself, is this:

How can I find a way of appearing to be busy-and earning a living, without actually becoming: an accountant, a teacher, or joining the Civil Service? In other words: How can I find a job, that isn't a proper one?

Relax and read on.

[You may think that the idea of relaxing is a bite at odds with a title like `Fighting For Fame.' But remember, approximately one in six people attempt to learn a musical instrument at some point in their lives. In other words, about ten million people in Britain alone. Obviously, since on the modern stage of life there is room for only a few hundred popstars at any given time-competition is fierce. And as any martial artist will tell you, the best way to win a fight is to relax. (Or cheat, but that's another story). Either way, if you are suitably relaxed (and also sitting comfortably), I shall begin….]

Now, before we get down to the serious business of discovering exactly How To Become A Popstar, it is time to answer the two questions that are bound to occur to you, sooner or later. Namely:

Why should I be a popstar?; and If this article works, how come you aren't a popstar--Mr. Author?

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Why should I be a popstar?

About the Author: Stan Cullimore -- was the guitarist and co-songwriter for a band called The Housemartins. This group was around in the mid-eighties, had numerous hits around the world (including at least one No. 1), and released several albums (which sold lots and lots of copies).

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